Ever wondered what the back-story behind something was?
What would Mr. and Mrs. Bennet’s courtship have been like? What was life like in the March household before the Civil War? Who wrote the Vogon report that recommended building a hyperspace bypass through Earth? Papercuts magazine asks you for the story behind the story.
Send us your poems and your fiction on the theme ‘Prequel’ by November 21st, 2012 at editor.papercuts[at]desiwriterslounge[dot]net. If you wish to write an article for us, please contact our Managing Editor at the same address to discuss ideas.
Please read the submission guidelines before contacting us and circulate the below image widely. Let’s see how creative everyone can get!
“Who wrote the Vogon report that recommended building a hyperspace bypass through Earth?”
Everyone knows that. It was the association of psychologists and psychiatrists who ordered the destruction of the Earth because had it been allowed to continue to exist, it would’ve calculated the Question to Life, Universe, and Everything. You see, the Earth was designed as the biggest, most powerful computer in the Universe and it was running a 10-million year program to find the Great Question. The Great Answer, of course, was already known, as it had been calculated by a computer known as Deep Thought – it took 7 million years – and we all know what it was: 42. But no one knew what the question was so they built Earth. The big conglomerate of psychologists and psychiatrists couldn’t let the question be known because it would put them out of business, as everyone would know both the Question as well as the Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything and they would all be happy. So, just as the 10 million years were almost up, they made an excuse of the hyperspace bypass and gave out a contract to those damn mindlessly bureaucratic and thick Vogons to destroy Earth. What’s ironic is that there was no need to demolish Earth because about halfway through the program, a spaceship – which was basically carrying idiots off of an overcrowded planet – had crashed on Earth, introducing humans to the planet. This effectively corrupted and ruined the program because before dying off and losing to evolution to the lesser but more evolved alien humans, the Scrabble playing local Neanderthals used the letter tiles to spell out the Great Question, which was, “What is six times nine?”
Can’t believe you didn’t know that.
Wait. What is six times nine?
54. The answer was supposed to be 42, remember? This means that the Earth calculated the wrong question and was a failure.